I Can Do It Myself: When Your Perfectionism Gets in the Way of Letting Others Help
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You ask for help. Somebody steps in. Then you start correcting, checking, or quietly redoing their work—and end up handling the whole thing yourself.
If you’ve ever thought, “It’s just easier if I do it,” this episode is for you.
We’re talking about how perfectionism can make sharing responsibility harder, even when you’re exhausted and genuinely want help. From rearranging the dishwasher to completely changing someone’s work, we’ll explore when a correction is necessary and when it’s simply a preference.
In this episode:
- Why doing something differently doesn’t automatically mean doing it wrong.
- How repeatedly taking over can discourage someone from trying again.
- The difference between giving useful feedback and replacing someone’s work.
- Why clear expectations matter before you hand off a task.
- How to share responsibility without supervising every step.
This isn’t a request to accept unfinished work or ignore someone who repeatedly lets you down. It’s a chance to notice the moments when someone is following through—and you’re struggling because their approach doesn’t look like yours.
Try this during the week
Choose one small task that someone else has agreed to handle. Be clear about the outcome and timing, then give them room to finish. Before stepping in, ask yourself:
“What actually needs fixing here?”
If there’s a real problem, give specific feedback and let them address it. If it’s a preference, practice leaving it alone—even after they’re done.
Does “Don’t worry, I’ll handle it” sound familiar? Explore six perfectionism archetypes and start recognizing the patterns behind your overwhelm.
